That Guy
by soynerve
Summary: Series of short one-shots on Gintoki and Hijikata, snap-shot-like with the occasional AU.
1. Men's Waltz

I saw him take his hand, a gentle movement with a touch that was sacred and bold, leading up to a tug and a pull. Come, he murmurs, follow me, lead me to the dance floor. He took a light step back, to the side, to the front, come, come, he invites, and seduces with a small teasing smile. Like a child, he urges, like an adult, he coaxes. He's not to be resisted, and so undoing his constrictions, the other man returned the playful sentiments. He touched him back with softness in his rough fingers, hesitant and anxious. Lead me, he whispers, follow me. The offer accepted, the deal struck, they begin to move - slight and cautious, this was not the smooth waltz of romance and lovers. They are not harmonious, only absently in tune with the double-faced music; they lead and follow in broken rhythm on a long-running bar. These men are elegant men, proud men; yet, they fumble when they face each other, and become clumsy in a way that cannot be seen. They are not in step with each other because they refuse to listen to the other, or any other, even while their hands are gripped together, deceiving of their softened hearts that beat irregularly, off-tempo from their partner. Still they continued - with each step they struggled to come to an understanding, with each turn, a consensus.

"Stop stepping on me, you idiot! I have to return these shoes, you know!"

"I wouldn't be stepping on them if you knew how to move properly!"

"You're too quick! You're musically inept aren't you? The world doesn't revolve around you, listen to the beat, stupid!"

"You're too slow! Are you retarded? How long does it take for your brain to process information? Stupid!"

"Your head isn't even in touch with the world. It's a simple 1, 2, 3 waltz, it's not going to abandon you and run away, so just step with it, idiot!"

"The crazy thick curls of your perm must be blocking all your senses. You're going at 0.5, 1, 1.5 instead of 1, 2, 3. Have you already been abandoned? Idiot!"

"It'll never abandon me, you'll get dumped first, mayonnaise-smoking demonic dope!"

"You'll be dumped first, sugar-inhaling silver-perm bum!"

"No, you'll get dumped,"

"No, you will,"

"Don't be stubborn and accept reality, you'll get dumped,"

"The one refusing to face reality is you, you dumped,"

"No, you've been dumped,"

"No, it's you,"

"No....."

They held tightly onto each other as they continued to step in various directions, spinning in unplanned circles. For the path of love never ran smooth, soon they were to end with a crash into the buffet table. Not wanting to witness the embarrassment, I quickly left the room, while the steady rhythm of the music mingled with spontaneous toneless vocals, followed by clinks and smashes.

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**A/N: The 'I' could be anyone, really. Tsunpo? Heh~ Anyway, hope you enjoyed it, and thank you very much for reading! Sorry for the lack of plot as always. It's uh...abstract and introspective...?**

**I know I didn't do the waltz justice at all, since I just wanted a dance scene...feel free to comment on that (or anything else, of course).**


	2. The Shinsengumi quarters

Standing outside the Shinsengumi quarters, Gintoki can hear the men training under Hijikata's forceful commands and violent threats. They shout in unison with each swing of the sword, some weaker than others, but the vice-commander would soon fix the discrepancy. Cries of indignation and fear to ones of anger come rolling one after the other - these are everyday sounds in Kondo and Hijikata's Shinsengumi.

Gintoki sneaks a glance at Hijikata, and sees heavy eye bags squinting through the field of men. He commands them to swing harder and shouts abuse; he kicks some subordinate, refusing him breakfast until he got his stance right. Kondo winces at the side but doesn't stop him; instead he goes over to the boy and pats his back sympathetically. Hijikata sighs, and soon breaks back into outbursts at the lethargic captain of the first squad.

Gintoki remembers that this elite force was made of once rogue samurai, loyal only to their commander. If they swung their swords and yelled manly things, it wasn't for the country, likewise for him. He quickly swerves back behind the wall before Hijikata can make a full turn of his head in his direction. The low, repetitive voices are broken through when he hears the rhythmic plucking of a shamisen, distinct even from a distance. The enigmatic melody is familiar and comforting, and even the small army of rough-and-brawl men on the other side seem to move in time with it. The sword and the instrument are the same - attacking, defending.

He ponders over the faint stain of blood left on the couch's back where Hijikata had been leaning against only a few nights ago, but decides to let him off for today. As long as the land remains walk-able and they able to walk, he tries to believe that they will be fine.

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**A/N: If you spot any grammatical inconsistencies please feel free to tell me. I've read it over quite a number of times but you'll never know...**


End file.
